Sharings in solitude- Loss of a Home
I met Bhaga ( like in Bhagavate- This is how she explained it to me ) at the Laboratory Of evolution at Auroville. It is a library and discussion space inside Bharat Nivas. For those of you not familiar with the concept of Auroville and The duo of Sri Aurobindo and the Mother, Please check the website, I will do a shoddier job anyway.
So this Library is a place I have been coming to whenever I come to Auroville ( Ive been coming here almost every year since 2011), It has brilliant collection of books and space to read with windows overlooking lot of Green.
Bhaga is a woman who goes to Lost and Found in Auroville and manages to find absolutely beautiful things like a turquoise coloured footwear! I cannot but notice that she changes earnings everyday .Today she wears a wooden teardrop hoop to go with her brown kaftan with tribal prints on her Mud brown maxi.Her pony is always tied to one side with red band.She tells me that it is the Libra in me that notices this.
Her invitation to her "work space" is around lunch and I expect a white marbled empty room, with desk, chair, plants and few wooden racks , of course there would be flowers arranged in a bowl filled with water ( Hadn't I seen so much of it in Sri Aurobindo school growing up?) To my happy amazement I find that she does have french windows and that her room , both inside and out, is painted white, but she has an entire wall filled with books.Books that have been picked up and kept many a times, books that are arranged in chaos where the user has placed it with precision.Books stacked neatly into different directions- Native Americn, Sri Aurobindo, Gnostic Christianity.There is a wooden cup filled with feathers of different kinds and sticks from trees. There is a picture of Jesus with open heart, radiating with pink light and his baby photograph with Mother Mary holding him with a smile of pride and shine in her eyes that only a mother has ( before she knew such a rebel he would turn out to be.)
This is when I noticed a Golden Heart with a fairy on top of it, having a soft corner for cupid and fairies I asked her to speak more about it.
She swallowed her saliva and breathed deep, I added, " you already know that you don't have to if you do not want.", "Yes Ofcourse" she said and continued.
" Like I told you , I used to live in the repose beach for more than 15 years, we had a small community, we had seen the sea and all its powers. We saw it turning dangerous,every night from, on my bed, I would feel the waves hitting the house.This went on and we lived there"
She then pointed towards a poster that called people to a party to raise funds for the community." Many came but the funds were not enough. It was this one fine morning! - Huh! 'Fine" morning ... I went outside my house and saw my neighbours house tilted to one side" she was bending down herself!
" The years of hitting of the waves had done its deed on the foundation! I felt my heart break" Her hands reached her heart and she breathed heavily some more, " I finally turned around after many many minutes and returned to see it called on the ground!" She stared at me for a few moments.
" I have heard about these things happening but this was just too much, It was as if a representation of what had happen to me that morning.I decided that I will not let my heart break with this event and brought all the pieces together and pasted them."
She smiles and adds, "Only one part of the heart is missing."
This is when every sentence she had already spoken about finding the present place, about her needed more space to watch the moon, stars and breathe good air took a different meaning.She had enthusiastically pulled up her woven curtains and showed me the table outside she uses to eat "when the weather is fine". She said, "when I live in closed spaces, my health deteriorates and my heart sinks" This is exactly what happens to me and my spirit. I Felt such emotions when I had to vacate my home for a year after a year for this journey and even now I think of it sometimes ( though I know the time had passed of being together with it) I can only imagine how much hers would have meant to her at this age after living in there for 15 years and more.
So this Library is a place I have been coming to whenever I come to Auroville ( Ive been coming here almost every year since 2011), It has brilliant collection of books and space to read with windows overlooking lot of Green.
Bhaga is a woman who goes to Lost and Found in Auroville and manages to find absolutely beautiful things like a turquoise coloured footwear! I cannot but notice that she changes earnings everyday .Today she wears a wooden teardrop hoop to go with her brown kaftan with tribal prints on her Mud brown maxi.Her pony is always tied to one side with red band.She tells me that it is the Libra in me that notices this.
Her invitation to her "work space" is around lunch and I expect a white marbled empty room, with desk, chair, plants and few wooden racks , of course there would be flowers arranged in a bowl filled with water ( Hadn't I seen so much of it in Sri Aurobindo school growing up?) To my happy amazement I find that she does have french windows and that her room , both inside and out, is painted white, but she has an entire wall filled with books.Books that have been picked up and kept many a times, books that are arranged in chaos where the user has placed it with precision.Books stacked neatly into different directions- Native Americn, Sri Aurobindo, Gnostic Christianity.There is a wooden cup filled with feathers of different kinds and sticks from trees. There is a picture of Jesus with open heart, radiating with pink light and his baby photograph with Mother Mary holding him with a smile of pride and shine in her eyes that only a mother has ( before she knew such a rebel he would turn out to be.)
This is when I noticed a Golden Heart with a fairy on top of it, having a soft corner for cupid and fairies I asked her to speak more about it.
She swallowed her saliva and breathed deep, I added, " you already know that you don't have to if you do not want.", "Yes Ofcourse" she said and continued.
" Like I told you , I used to live in the repose beach for more than 15 years, we had a small community, we had seen the sea and all its powers. We saw it turning dangerous,every night from, on my bed, I would feel the waves hitting the house.This went on and we lived there"
She then pointed towards a poster that called people to a party to raise funds for the community." Many came but the funds were not enough. It was this one fine morning! - Huh! 'Fine" morning ... I went outside my house and saw my neighbours house tilted to one side" she was bending down herself!
" The years of hitting of the waves had done its deed on the foundation! I felt my heart break" Her hands reached her heart and she breathed heavily some more, " I finally turned around after many many minutes and returned to see it called on the ground!" She stared at me for a few moments.
" I have heard about these things happening but this was just too much, It was as if a representation of what had happen to me that morning.I decided that I will not let my heart break with this event and brought all the pieces together and pasted them."
She smiles and adds, "Only one part of the heart is missing."
This is when every sentence she had already spoken about finding the present place, about her needed more space to watch the moon, stars and breathe good air took a different meaning.She had enthusiastically pulled up her woven curtains and showed me the table outside she uses to eat "when the weather is fine". She said, "when I live in closed spaces, my health deteriorates and my heart sinks" This is exactly what happens to me and my spirit. I Felt such emotions when I had to vacate my home for a year after a year for this journey and even now I think of it sometimes ( though I know the time had passed of being together with it) I can only imagine how much hers would have meant to her at this age after living in there for 15 years and more.
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